


Shreds some more, this ams a war

by BrutalWarElf



Series: Torture is Masturbation 'verse [3]
Category: Metalocalypse
Genre: Aggression, Dom/sub, Jealousy, Light BDSM, M/M, Toki is a terrible dom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-07
Updated: 2014-03-07
Packaged: 2018-01-14 22:42:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1281463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrutalWarElf/pseuds/BrutalWarElf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Skwisgaar loved him, but most days felt like 360 degree combat. Thankfully, it so happened that Toki had been raised on brutality.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shreds some more, this ams a war

**Author's Note:**

> For tumblr user Skwistok, my Metalocalypse Exchangearooni gift

Skwisgaar loved him, but most days felt like 360 degree combat. Skwisgaar had declared war on his self-esteem from the moment they met – however little he had to begin with. During the days Toki clung to shreds of his dignity as Skwisgaar ripped into his guitar playing; during the nights he had to fight every woman in the world tooth and nail in the hopes of being worthy of Skwisgaar’s attention.

There was no denying that they were inexorably bound together, whether by co-dependency, love or pain, but they were bonds Skwisgaar sought to flee whenever he could. He always returned if he needed Toki to make him better, or to love him, or hurt him, but that never made the wait any easier.

He managed to make do with whatever Skwisgaar deigned to give him, soaking up the intimacy and holding on to it to counter the longing and the deprivation that always followed on its heels. Their love was a double-edged blade and Skwisgaar wielded it without mercy.

When Skwisgaar gave, he gave everything, such was his nature – but it never lasted long. Toki had learned not to ask, for it upended the carefully laid out game. He waited, and Skwisgaar came to him. The stage was always set at his request. It was always about Skwisgaar. 

 

Toki loved how corpse paint looked on Skwisgaar. He hungrily watched him apply the make-up with a sponge in the bathroom mirror backstage. The white foundation accented his cruel cheekbones exponentially and the black eye shadow enhanced his pale, deep set eyes. The bright light of the mirror refracted off his hair, transforming him into a capricious deity rather than a musician.

It had been an unfair amount of time since Skwisgaar had last come to him. Was he waiting for something? Maybe it was time for Toki to take the initiative and sweep him off his feet for once. However, if he was going to change the rules of their game he would have to be careful.

He finished his corpse paint to look equally menacing as Skwisgaar’s, and gave him a hard, piercing stare in the mirror. Stepping up to him, he crowded a little more into his space than strictly necessary, back ramrod straight and shoulders squared.

Skwisgaar put down his sponge contemplatively, and raised a single eyebrow. Despite his frosty demeanour he was giving Toki his full attention.  

‘Gots any plans after de shows?’ Toki demanded, staring him down. 

‘Why ams you askingks?’ He countered with a coy smirk. He knew exactly why.

‘I’ms askins because I wants to bends you over my knee and spanks your ass raw. It’s been too long since you last cames to me.’

Skwisgaar lowered his eyes first.

‘I wills haves to think abouts it. Depends on what else ams on offers tonight.’ He did not quite meet Toki’s gaze, and his waggling eyebrows did nothing to make that statement less hurtful. Toki was plan B.

‘Takes it or leaves it.’ He said curtly, and turned on his heel to grab his guitar.

 

Toki lingered at the after party until it became painfully apparent that he had no place in Skwisgaar’s plans at all. He narrowed his eyes in response to the conspiratorial wink Skwisgaar sent his way when he left the establishment with no less than five women on his arms. To say that he felt insulted was an understatement. He felt disappointed, lost and lonely, too. A refill of straight vodka went a long way towards assuaging those feelings.

 

Directly on the heels of the tour Offdensen locked them in the studio. Recording a new album was generally a trying time for Toki, and this one was no exception. He had learned his parts and learned them well, but it was seldom enough to pass the bar Skwisgaar set. Despite the fact that he had learned to handle criticism rather well – public humiliation was one of the things that had the ability to push him past his breaking point like nothing short of solitary confinement or a flogging.

The pressure was on. With each offhand remark from Skwisgaar, Nathan and Pickles his takes grew worse.

‘Doods, whey is this ghey even in our bend?’

‘Can you guys imagine how much easier recording would be if we had just agreed to do it Skwisgaar’s way right off the bet? I still don’t know what got into you, dude.’

‘Ja, wells, I regrets my diskisions sometimes. Like nows.’

The talkback microphone delivered their derisive comments straight into his ears. He lowered his head and tried to calm his breathing in face of the waves of mortification rolling over him.

‘Oh, look likes mister sensitives ams havingks a little breaksdown.’ Skwisgaar read him like an open book these days, but he never used it for good.

The hot, smouldering anger vying for dominance with tears of humiliation must be painfully obvious in the bright light of the recording booth.

‘Hej, Toki, I don’ts knows if you gots the memos, but we ams tryingks to makes a brutal records here, and you ams about as far from brutal as poskible rights now. Don’ts be a babies and gets it right.’

‘You wants to come in here and says that to my face, Skwisgaar?’ He snarled back. Skwisgaar needed him to be brutal, did he? Well, it so happened that Toki had been raised on brutality in ways that the rest of them could not even begin to fathom.

Suffering neglect and being unloved paled in comparison to the bite of the lash, the cold dark isolation of the punishment hole, the gruelling labour. If they needed a display of brutality he could provide just that.

‘Whoa, you’d better watch your step, Skwisgaar, if he gets pissed…’ Nathan warned.

Skwisgaar turned to him, Toki’s challenge sliding off the barrier of his aloof exterior.

‘Don’ts gets you panty in a bunch, Toki ams mostly harm-’

Toki yanked off his Flying V and swung it by the strap at the window separating him from the rest of the band. Shattered glass showered his feet and the engineering panel alike. That got their attention. They jumped out of their chairs and scrambled towards the exit under appalled shouts.

Nathan, Murderface and Pickles fled into the hallway and slammed the door in Skwisgaar’s face.

‘Guess whet, Skwisgaar, ye’re ahn yer own! Mostly hermless right? Come git us when you gheys have sorted it out.’ Pickles shouted through the thick wood.

And with those words they offered Skwisgaar up like a sacrificial lamb.

‘Why don’ts you come in here so we cans compare notes on brutality?’ Toki shouted through the hole in the glass, spreading his hands in invitation.

‘Toki, you ams beingks a petkulant child.’ Skwisgaar snubbed, but his voice was unsteady with apprehension.

When Skwisgaar faced him down inside the recording booth, he was ninety percent bullshit, and Toki saw right through that. They both knew who had the upper hand now.

‘Gets on your knees.’

Skwisgaar hesitated before he knelt with a hint of trepidation lighting in his eyes. His arrogant mask waivered, but he held his back straight as he clasped his hands behind him like Toki usually required of him.

‘You think you has seen de extents of my brutality because you lets me slaps you around a bit whenever you – needs – a – firm – hands?!’ He punctuated his words with a couple of backhanded smacks across Skwisgaar’s gaunt cheeks.

Skwisgaar drew a sharp breath.

‘I’ms always in controls when we scene; I can’ts lose myself like you cans, and you knows why?’ He circled around Skwisgaar to yank his head backwards by his hair. ‘I thinks you do. When I lose myself, peoples dies.’ He spelled it out slowly with his mouth against his ear.

A barely audible whimper escaped Skwisgaar’s lips.

‘Brutality builts me from de ground up. It haves hounded my steps all my lifes like de only faithful lovers I has ever knowns.’ He lowered his mouth to Skwisgaar’s neck and bit down hard enough to bruise.

‘Toki,’ Came a ragged moan.

‘And as much as I woulds likes to gets revenge for all my pains in shards of glass and puddle of bloods, I honestly don’ts thinks you cans handle me when I gets truly brutal.’

Skwisgaar’s chest heaved as he leaned into Toki’s touch.

‘Does it turns you on when I talks to you like dat? Does de proskect of me ventins my rage on you body fills you with fear?’ A hesitant nod supported the visual evidence of the rigid outline of his erection.

‘Tough luck,’ He snarled, pushing Skwisgaar away. ‘I’ms too pissed off to takes care of you. I’ms not goins to risk hurtins you.’

‘Please, Toki –’        

‘Don’ts beg. You know I haves a hard time denyins you anythinks. Dis ams my last warnins.’

‘Toki, I reallies needs you.’

Something in him snapped. He sunk to his knees to face Skwisgaar on eye level and roughly grabbed his chin. Skwisgaar flinched violently.

‘You don’ts needs me, you manipulative whores, don’ts you ever lies to me likes dat agains!’ He raged into Skwisgaar’s face. He gave him a shove, slamming him into the speaker cabinets. Skwisgaar broke his fall with his hands, and pushed himself up with his back against the amplifiers.

Yanking the jacks out of his guitar and the speaker, he held up the wire under Skwisgaar’s nose.

‘If I didn’ts haves such a tight lids on my anger, you knows whats I woulds be doins right now?’ He tugged the ends of the wire so that it pulled taut with a snap.

Skwisgaar shook his head imperceptibly.

‘I woulds ties you down with dis until you couldn’ts move an inch.’

He threw it away demonstratively and grabbed a shard of glass so tightly that it bit into his hand. Drops of blood rolled down his wrist as he shook it in Skwisgaar’s face.

‘I woulds tears you clothes off so I cans carves you skin until it spells out what you ams for all the worlds to see.’

Holding the glass like a knife he wrote S L U T in mid-air, eyes trained on Skwisgaar’s appalled expression.  

‘I’d likes to says dats I woulds fucks you bloody afterward, but I don’ts think I coulds, ‘cause I loves you too godsdamned much!’ His voice rose angrily on the last three syllables.

The bloodied shard clattered to the floor when he opened his hand. He accidentally rubbed his face with his bloody palm.

‘We’s done.’ He said tiredly. Getting up, he slapped on a neutral expression for the sake of the others.

 

The door to the hallway opened onto a cacophony.

‘Charles! Charles – Charles, you don’t understand! That kid will rip Skwisgaar limb from limb.’

‘Yeah, we saw him beat a ghey to death with his bare hehnds at that Snakes ‘n Barrels gig, didn’t we ever tell you about that?!’ Pickles’ voice bordered on hysterical. 

‘You didn’t, but, ah, I did happen to have erased all the evidence of Dethklok’s involvement, so… All I’m saying is, Toki and Skwisgaar- Oh, hello, Toki.’

‘It’s cool guys, you cans come back in.’ He smiled with a cheerfulness he did not feel.

The other members of Dethklok warily filed past him into the studio while Charles gave Toki an assessing look.

‘You okay, Toki? There’s, ah, blood on your face.’

‘Yeah, I cuts my hands on a shards of glass. We needs a new windows, apolgiseks.’

‘I’ll send in some Klokateers to replace it.’ He briefly squeezed Toki’s shoulder. His half-smile said: Good for you, don’t let those dicks fuck with you too much.

When Toki walked back in, Skwisgaar was fending off their intrusive bandmates and angrily wiping at his face with his hands. He couldn’t help but feel a tingle of satisfaction at how shaken up Skwisgaar looked. Perhaps Toki had been too cruel, but he sincerely felt like Skwisgaar had deserved some rough treatment.  

A new window was installed, and when the servants had swept up the last shards Toki took up his place in the recording booth again. He nailed his takes this time; playing with the precision he imagined using to slice letters into Skwisgaar’s skin. Keeping eye contact with him while he visualised exactly that made his fingers dance lightly across the strings.

Skwisgaar tried to keep it together, but he looked more uncomfortable and distraught with every riff that Toki successfully recorded.

‘Hey Toki, this is really good. Almost as good as Skwisgaar, I’m not kidding.’ Nathan growled from behind the mixing panel.

‘Maybe we should let him beat Skwisgare up befehre every recehrding.’ Pickles joked.

‘-And every schow.’ Murderface interjected unnecessarily.

Skwisgaar shoved his chair back and stormed out.

 

 

Toki was feeling around for the light switch before fully entering his room when he heard it; the faint sound of breathing. Why on earth would there be someone in his room – in the dark, no less? And why was it so warm in here? Assessing the threat level quickly, he decided he would handle the situation without alerting security. There were weapons stashed all over his rooms should the need arise.

He flipped the switch before closing his door behind him so that the person in his room would lose their cover of darkness. The sight greeting him was not one he had been prepared for. Doing a double take he took a step back.

Skwisgaar was kneeling on the cold, hard tiles in front of his bed, arms clasped behind his back and head bowed. He was stark naked, his pale gold hair hanging to his waist in a ponytail, prepared in every way for whatever Toki might require of him.

Toki was taken aback, and instead of feeling pleased or aroused he felt insulted. Skwisgaar just though he could barge in here and Toki would be so flattered by his little visit that he would pick up where he left off? Well, he’d had his fill of Skwisgaar dictating every aspect of his life, and he was not about to let him assume control over this situation as well.

He stripped down to his boxer shorts, laying his clothes neatly across the back of his chair without saying a word. Skwisgaar looked up at him, a myriad emotions swirling behind his eyes, but Toki didn’t feel like acknowledging them.

Not touching Skwisgaar as he stepped past him to his bed required every shred of self-control he could muster. He settled under the covers and gave Skwisgaar a flat look. The raw agony of denying himself this pulled at the corners of his mouth, but he had his pride.

‘Gets dressed and leaves, Skwisgaar. I’ms goins to sleeps.’

The rejection visibly hit him hard; it had probably been a while since anyone had denied Skwisgaar Skwigelf anything. He opened his mouth to speak, but couldn’t find any words to say.

Toki turned off the light and rolled over to face the wall. He didn’t actually fall asleep until Skwisgaar finally got up and dressed about half an hour later, but he managed not to cave all the same.

 

The next night, when he returned to his room after a day of hard but satisfying work in the studio, he was genuinely surprised to find Skwisgaar in exactly the same position. On second thought he shouldn’t have been surprised, because Skwisgaar knew like no other that perseverance was the way to get where you wanted to be.

Meekness was a good look on him, Toki thought for the thousandth time as he approached Skwisgaar’s kneeling figure. No one else would be able to tell that that was the look Skwisgaar was going for – not with that proud posture and those austere features – but Toki knew surrender had many forms.

That did not mean that he was ready to give in just yet. He didn’t know what he was holding out for, but it had to be something better than the promise of a single heated night followed by the same old pining. He felt sick and weak with his addictive longing. What Skwisgaar offered him was only fuel to the all-consuming flames of his love, never enough to grant him a measure of peace, as he imagined real love ought to.

Shedding his clothes save his underwear he sat cross-legged on his bed and weighed Skwisgaar with his gaze. He had been different today when Toki recorded the last of his parts for the new album; gentler and more encouraging than he had been since their first record. Toki wasn’t sure he liked it that way, actually. Most of their relationship was built on polemics.

The silence was deafening as Toki raked his eyes over his long limbs, glowing with unearthly pallor in the light from overhead. Colour slowly suffused Skwisgaar’s cheeks the longer Toki stared. He looked vulnerable, but was by no means unarmed. His beauty was a weapon as deadly as anything. 

It was an effort not to reach out and give that tail a little tug or splay his palms across the flat planes of his shoulder blades. He managed to stave off his arousal until he noticed Skwisgaar getting hard under his scrutiny; cock swelling subtly between his legs at first, then rising up sharply to brush against his abdomen.

His underwear started feeling uncomfortably tight, but he refused to be ruled by his base desire to lay Skwisgaar out on his bed and fuck him open.  Pulling the blankets over himself he told Skwisgaar to go. He refused, again.

‘Amen’ts you tireds after all the work you dids on the album? Goes to beds, Skwisgaar.’

‘Cans I sleeps with you?’ He had the audacity to ask.

‘Fucks no.’

Skwisgaar remained where he was, so Toki switched off the light and tried to settle comfortably on his back. The image of Skwisgaar kneeling naked and aroused three feet away was pure torture. He made a valiant effort to ignore his cock, which was throbbing heavily against his hipbone.

Forty-five minutes later he had to admit that this was not working.

‘Fucks off, Skwisgaar.’ He repeated.

‘Why?’

‘Because my fuckins boner ams keepins me up.’

‘Goods to hears.’ His smug smile was apparent even in the darkness. ‘You wants me to takes cares of dat for you?’ He slurred seductively.

‘Don’ts makes me kicks you out.’

 

Toki admired the tenacity with which Skwisgaar kept up his efforts over the course of the following days. The finished recordings meant that he had a lot more time on his hands to think of elaborate ways to negate Toki’s butthurt attitude. Sleeping at the foot end of Toki’s bed, covering it in toys he wanted Toki to use on him, cuffing himself to the frame... Each night Toki was a little more amused and a little less angry, but it still did not feel right to give in. The change was too superficial.

 

After a week of stubbornly rejecting Skwisgaar’s efforts he found himself alone again when he entered his room at night. It was disappointing to a certain degree, though not as painful as having his own efforts rejected before.

He sat down behind his computer to upload a picture he had secretly taken of Skwisgaar the night before, but before he could hook up his Dethphone his door opened.

‘Toki, cans we talks?’ Skwisgaar was fully dressed and smiling almost apologetically.

‘Sures.’

He let Skwisgaar take his hand and guide him to the bed, and they sat down side by side.

‘I’s been thinkingks,’ Skwisgaar started, ‘I’ms goingks about dis all wrong. I kept actingks on my own perskective – what I wanteds from you – and assumingks that what I needs ams what you wanteds, too. But it ament’s.’

‘Well, it ams, but… I guess I just wants more.’ He confessed.

‘I’s been unsfair to you, Toki. I wants you to has as much of a say in dis thing as I do.’ He drew something from his back pocket. ‘I’ms not goingks to promise you…you know? But I wants you to has dis.’

It was a slim leather collar; simple, black, unadorned save for a metal ring at the centre. 

Symbolic.

Skwisgaar was giving him the power to collar him.

Toki was speechless for a moment when he took it from Skwisgaar’s hands. He clutched it tightly in his fist as he brought his other hand up to Skwisgaar’s face.

‘Dis mean a lot,’ he whispered before pressing his lips to Skwisgaar’s cheekbone. He felt Skwisgaar’s arm circle around his waist and squeeze a little.

‘Whenever you ams ready,’ Skwisgaar said invitingly.

 

 

Even though the collar was burning a hole in his pocket, Toki did not go to Skwisgaar that night, or the next.

The time was right when he heard Klokateers escort a gaggle of women to Skwisgaar’s room. He counted ten minutes on the clock and followed after them, collar folded neatly in his hand. From behind Skwisgaar’s door he could hear the ladies croon and in turn giggle at Skwisgaar’s low replies.

He rapped on the door sharply, authoritatively. If he could pull this off, it would be the ultimate power play. His heart beat a quick rhythm against his ribcage.

‘Who ams dis?’ He heard Skwisgaar demand.

‘It’s Toki.’

A long pause stretched.

‘Comes in. What does you needs?’ Skwisgaar sat up straight on the edge of his bed, the touches of the women sliding off his bare chest and back.

‘I needs you,’ He responded with a small smirk, belatedly adding for the benefit of the ladies, ‘for something. But if it amen’ts a good times…?’

Skwisgaar’s inner struggle played out beautifully across his face. Toki waited him out.

He nodded. ‘It ams alrights.’ He turned to the three ladies standing around with their drinks. ‘Change of plan, ladies.’ A Klokateer rounded them up, leaving Toki alone with Skwisgaar.

‘Takes a showers, you smells like cheap sluts.’

 

Skwisgaar emerged from his bathroom naked, with his wet hair flat against his scalp, long bony arms swaying softly as he walked over to where Toki sat on the bed. Toki ran the collar through his fingers as he knelt between his legs on the plush white rug. Skwisgaar lifted his hair away from his neck, allowing Toki to buckle the collar snugly at the nape.

The black leather formed a splendid contrast with Skwisgaar’s pale skin.

Toki leisurely played with Skwisgaar’s hair, letting the damp strands slip through his fingers before tying it securely in a ponytail. He motioned for Skwisgaar to get onto the bed on all fours. That allowed Toki to run his hands all over him, reclaiming every inch of skin from the greedy hands of Skwisgaar’s countless lovers – at least for the moment. Usually he accepted the competition as a fact of life, but he had not quite been able to let go of the remainder of his jealousy since that painful rejection.

Rummaging through the drawer where Skwisgaar kept his toys he briefly entertained the notion of tying him down and gagging him, but he was more in the mood for screams and thrashing tonight if Skwisgaar was willing to grant him that.

He settled on a bit of rope and a fairly harmless riding crop in case he went off the deep end. The tension between them was not exactly helpful for his self-control. He trusted Skwisgaar to use his safe word only as far as he trusted himself not to get too caught up, which was barely. Grabbing a bottle of lube as an afterthought, he climbed onto the bed behind Skwisgaar. He had better prepare him for every eventuality now that he still had a clear mind.

Hooking a finger behind the collar he pulled Skwisgaar’s back against his chest. The stiff fabric of his pants rustled as he palmed Skwisgaar’s thighs and abdomen, raking his nails through the light hairs. He avoided touching his swollen cock, which elicited a low plea.

His slick fingers worked with brutal efficiency while Skwisgaar begged for more than Toki was willing to give. He made the best facial expressions, Toki thought, both when playing guitar and having sex. Drawing his face closer with his free hand, he first placed a kiss on Skwisgaar’s long nose before moving on to his panting mouth. The angle made for a very sloppy and unfulfilling kiss, but it suited the charged mood between them.

Without regard for the pristine white, he wiped the excess lube on Skwisgaar’s sheets and tied his hands together before pushing him back on hands and knees. Skwisgaar took deep, steadying breaths in anticipation of what was to come.

Toki slid off the bed, and Skwisgaar followed him with his eyes. Forcing Skwisgaar to look straight ahead, he picked up the crop and braced one careless boot on the edge of the bed. He smacked his own thigh with the crop to get a feel for the intensity, noting with glee that Skwisgaar twitched at the sound. Just to mess with his head, he didn’t strike Skwisgaar immediately after but pushed the leather flap against his flushed hole, making him jolt forwards. His cock strained against his pants in response to the sight.

He lashed out and found he couldn’t stop after the three strikes he intended. He let the crop fall until Skwisgaar’s entire backside turned pink and he was groaning through gritted teeth.

Taking a minute to catch his breath, Toki brushed the end of the crop up and down Skwisgaar’s inner thighs. The groans did not abate.

‘Stops complainins,’ he scolded, ‘you haves broughts dis upon yourself. Dids you honestly think you coulds come crawlins back and I woulds let you gets away with your insults?’ He growled, striking him on the back of his thighs repeatedly.

Possessiveness burned him like a furnace while icy currents of scorn threatened to pull him under, and his sanity slowly succumbed to the torrent of emotions. It was as if he was trying to erase all previous touches from Skwisgaar’s skin by scouring it with the crop, the strength of his arm fuelled by jealous anger.

The sounds Skwisgaar was making seemed to well up from the core of his being, stripped of all pretence;  harsh, raw shouts that filled Toki with sadness as well as arousal.

‘If upgradins to an orgy of sluts ams so much betters, why comes back to me at all?’

As Skwisgaar’s primal shouts started to peak Toki moved on to his back, swinging in a slow rhythm that gathered speed the more he cracked the crop across the expanse of skin.

‘All – dose – gods – damned – womens.’ He punctuated each word with a smack.

He was ripped from his all-consuming rage by Skwisgaar twisting around and raising his bound arms to block his downswing.

‘Enough, Tokis!’ He begged.

At his plea Toki hurled the crop aside, and it clattered against one of Skwisgaar’s dumb Ikea lamps. He was not going to desist until he heard a safe word, however. Still in his boots and clothes, he only paused long enough to unzip his pants. Wrestling Skwisgaar onto his back knowing full well that it must be on fire, he flung one of Skwisgaar’s big gangly legs over his shoulder before breaching him with difficulty. He had to work against the weight of Skwisgaar’s leg, and the angle of the position made him clench tight. Sweat dripped from his forehead onto Skwisgaar’s chest.

Face scrunching up, Skwisgaar cried out as Toki angrily fucked into him. He wrapped one arm around his leg, holding it tight against his chest. His nails dug into skin as he braced himself against Skwisgaar’s shoulder with the other.

‘What ams it abouts dem, huh? They don’ts even knows you! They don’ts loves you like I does!’ He shouted aggressively into his face.

It wasn’t so much the physical sensation of burying his cock inside him that sent him over the edge, but rather the full lips stretching around heart-wrenching sounds as he suffered Toki’s abuse. 

His release opened a floodgate of regret as he became aware of the unshed tears of pain and humiliation glistening in Skwisgaar’s lowered eyes.

‘Skwis?’ He rolled onto the mattress to get level with him.

‘You ams right – I ams a sluts and an asshole. I don’ts de-’ He fought to keep his tone even and his voice unaffected, but failed miserably. Toki’s conduct of the past days must have eroded his confidence in a big way.

‘Hush, I don’ts wants to hears dat.’ Pulling Skwisgaar on top of him he planted kisses on the top of his head with all the apologetic tenderness he could muster. ‘I’m so sorries – I handles dis very badly.’ He whispered into his hair.

Skwisgaar remained passive and silent for a long while, but when Toki ran cool hands over the flaming skin of his back he sighed in appreciation and sought his mouth with his own.

Soaking up comfort from their languid kisses soon turned into the shedding of Toki’s clothes when Skwisgaar’s unfulfilled desire made itself known. The mood had shifted 180 degrees from the way they started out; smouldering embers rather than crackling electricity. Skwisgaar did a perfunctory preparation, then settled his long legs between Toki’s, tucking his arms tightly around his waist and neck as he filled him up.

When Toki in turn surrendered to him, every gentle slide of their bodies worked towards dislodging the malcontent he never managed to shake when he tore into Skwisgaar.

‘We ams so bads for each other, Toki.’ Skwisgaar whispered, his face stretching in a silent moan.

‘Shoulds we stop?’ Toki tilted his hips to meet his thrusts.

‘Does you thinks we coulds?’

‘If I killeds myself, maybe.’

‘Toki!’ Skwisgaar gasped before his climax punched the breath out of him. Toki couldn’t tell if it was an admonition or an invocation.

 

Pressing their sweaty foreheads together, Toki let out a melancholy sigh.

‘Why can’ts we just loves each other like regular jack-offs?’ He wondered idly.

‘Because we amen’ts regular jack-offs. At least – I’ms not. I’ms a gods. Not shores abouts you.’

Skwisgaar’s dorky, throaty laugh shook both their bodies until Toki punched him in the shoulder with a grin.

 


End file.
